Woot woot!

100th post! How cool is that? O.K. So maybe it's not that cool at all but whatever! (well I secretly do think it's cool so... yeah!)

How old are you? How old do you feel? I've had to smack my girls over the head once or twice before with a resounding "I am not THAT old!!!" ... oh wait... quickly do the math in my head... maybe I am THAT old. Ok so I'm ONLY 27.... well... almost 28... which I realize isn't that old at all... but that's darn close to thirty which we all know IS old! That is until the day you turn it. Isn't that how it works?

And where I was going with this is... (and no I have not hit my mid life crisis.) Where I was going was this... maybe you'll find the same thing true for yourself. I hardly ever feel my age. If I am at the ripe old age of twenty three let's just say, I'll feel twenty. If I'm twenty-five... I'll feel twenty-three or so... Presently I am twenty eight (rounding up) so accordingly I should feel twenty-five-ish...

Except that today I don't.
Except that this week has hit me like a tone of bricks...
Instead of feeling younger then I am I feel like I should be adding a year
to
every
passing
day
of
the
week.
Now I could go on tell you exactly why it is that I am feeling this way but you wouldn't understand... Trust me you wouldn't. Besides... you don't want to know such intimate details about me... how weird would THAT be? Haha...

It's actually not that bad, well.. It is, but it isn't. (See I TOLD you you wouldn't understand!) It IS bad but I really shouldn't be surprised... and I shouldn't give it half as much thought and heart, and time, and effort and... you get the picture... as I presently do. But like I said... I shouldn't be surprised.

Listening to Colbie Caillat right now on Iceberg radio. If you haven't come across the station yet you should check it out. There is something for everyone... (I think.) There is was too many stations for me to check them all! Adult Contemporary, New Hits Mix is one I've settled on for now and am loving... hmmm... maybe 95% of the stuff. It's not like it's a huge rotation of music but right now that's suiting me just fine. The stuff they do play I love so I don't mind hearing the same thing twice in two hours or whatever it may be... give me two weeks and I will vomit at the sound of it.

I recycle. Currently there is probably one blue bin sitting in my back lane, one in the back yard, and one in my kitchen, under the sink. There is seven of us so we go through a lot of stuff... We go through a lot despite the fact that teenagers do not retain such trivial information and repeatedly throw stuff into the garbage that rightfully belongs in the blue bin! (Inconveniently located half a foot to the left of the garbage. I'm harsh that way!)

Milk jugs, glass jars, tin cans, plastic bottles (gasp!) yogurt containers, newspapers, flyers... you name it, you will find it in there. That is except for one minor thing. Toilet paper rolls. I refuse to recycle toilet paper rolls! Why you ask? Well it's quite simple... let me lay it out for you. Two bathrooms in the house. One on each floor. Main floor bathroom... and ok, to be truthful maybe those will get recycled once in a blue moon, but as far as the ones from upstairs, no way, no how!

Conrad attempts, he's got a good heart and I... well I end up looking like some kind of anti-tree-hugging-bully as I repeatedly squash his feeble attempts... Literally that is. I squash them little rolls and chuck them straight into the garbage and no, I do not loose any sleep over it! Heathen I am, I know... it's just that if I don't they end up accumulating all over my bathroom! It's like an alien invasion! They propagate over night! Some on the back of the toilet, some on the window sill. (hmm... is that the right spelling?) Before I know it they are rolling around on the floor mocking me... I swear they mock me!

Sometimes Conrad...the good hearted man that he is... did I mention he's got a good hearted? Cuz he's got a good hearted.. he will take them as far as to the top of the stairs thinking he will take them down the next time he's heading that way. Well...you guessed it,he doesn't and when I come UP the stirs there they are! Right in my face! I can't get away from them!

So.. the point of my story here, is this... that if your watching me through my bathroom window you:

A)have BIG problems and are in serious need of professional help and...
B) you are under the wrongful assumption that I don't recycle. Because I recycle.

I am so darn frustrated right now that I am at the point of tears! Either that or I'll rip my hair out! Maybe both.

And on a different note...

A quote that resonates within me...

I fully realize that I have not succeeded in answering all of your questions... Indeed, I feel I have not answered any of them completely. The answers I have found only serve to raise a whole new set of questions, which only lead to more problems, some of which we weren't even aware were problems. To sum it all up... In some ways I feel we are confused as ever, but I believe we are confused on a higher level, and about more important things.

- Unknown

I am

Looking out the window,
Can you see me tonight?
Through the foggy morning,
and In the creeping night..

You take my breath away,
Wait... no, it's just me...
Inattentive to my need.
I am...
Preoccupied beyond belief.

I flounder,
and I've stumbled,
I've gotta keep my head down to the ground...
I've walked this way a thousand times,
and don't know my way out.

I am...
Preoccupied beyond belief.

Meet my pooch Zoe.. or Zoolander as I affectionately call her...






Meet my pooch Zoe.. or Zoolander as I affectionately call her...